after reading over the thread I just saw this:
Using DEFINE OSC 20 I had erroneous results on the LCD, so it's obviously a timing issue with your 4MHz resonator
I took out my resonator and used the chips' internal oscillator but I get the same results so this rules out the resonator I was using.

When using LCD_AnyPin it works with 8 MHz but the timing is doubled, if I set to 4 MHz the timing is is ok and LCD is blank.

Furthermore using standard settings for LCD does not work at all settings for OSC.

Help!