burning pins

[lerameur]

I did add 5k resistor between the pin and the gate. I also added a 100k resistor to the ground from the gate so that it stays at zero volt when not used. I found out that some relays where turning on for no apparent reason, with the 100k resistor it fixed that problem.
could there be spikes from the ground coming from the coil in the relay when it collapse. (shutting down)

k

[mackrackit]

could there be spikes from the ground coming from the coil in the relay when it collapse. (shutting down)

YES
Do you have a "flyback"diode across the relay coil?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flyback_diode
http://www.4qdtec.com/catch.html

[lerameur]

flyback .. no

ok here are the parts I have
pin----5.1k-----gate
drain ----100k-----source
source----ground
12v---coil----220ohm-----drain

I will add a flyback thanks

k

[skimask]

Doin' good so far...'cept for the missing flyback diode always use one...make sure you get it in the right way!
Are you using an N-channel MOSFET? Using the PIC to add a ground to the coil? The 100k resistor is bleeding off any leakage coming thru the MOSFET. N-channel aren't so bad for this, P-channel's are worse (and you have to pull the gate the other way)...that's probably why the MOSFET would turn on for no apparent reason.