Thanks Squibcakes.

I'm perplexed. I'll tell you what I've done.

I have an MELABS USB Programmer and a handful of 16F88s.
I have Proton IDE+Microloader and TinyLoader.

What I want to achieve:
In-circuit serial programming in my own designed pcbs.

How far have I got?
Halfway.
I can programme from the USB Programmer fine. All functions work.
So far, so good.

I have a serial PCB with MAX232 and a ZIF socket.
This is where it all goes wrong.

Here is what I have done:-
I transfer the 16F88 from the programmer to the serial PCB.
I connect cable and switch it all on.
I then try loading a 3 line programme using Microloader.
Cannot load, press reset numerous times - no joy.
I then try Tinyloader - cannot find PIC.
(COM setting correct and I've tried every baud option)
No joy. Neither can recognise the presence of a PIC.

What I have checked on serial pcb +MAx232 (or equiv.).
1. Power.
2. RS232 voltages fine (nom +/-10V)
3. Reset conencted.
4. Connections to Rb6 and Rb7. Fine.
5. Optionally taken Rb3 to ground via resistor.

Then connected oscillioscope:
1. Connected to; MCLR, Rb7 and Rb6 on 16F88.
2. On USB Programmer it does a Reset .... 7mS .... activity on Rb7 & Rb6.
3. On serial card (using Microloader) it does Reset ... repeated 250uS pulse on Rb7, nothing on Rb6.
4. On serial card (using Tinyloader) it holds reset down and double pulses Rb7. (Why it holds reset down - regardless of 'options' settings is odd.)

But there seems to be no response from the 16F88.

Stick it back in the programmer and all is fine!

Sadly, I need the ICSP for 2 reasons:
a) So I can test programme in-situ (like everyone else does).
b) Proton Microloader only supports COMs (as does Tinyloader??)
c) Be able to programme device using a simple serial cable and not have to use USB programmer. i.e. a box with a serial port on the side.

So, assuming my serial card with MAX232 isn't wrong (and all the pin measurements say its OK), what haven't I done?

Keep in mind this is my first forray into PIC programming. I've only used PICAXE and Stamp previously.

Copious thanks to the first person who prevents me having to buy Just For Men!