If I understand the project correctly your logic is "OK".
Answer to question #1- Darrel Taylor posted a week or so ago a timer that tested to within 1 second in a 24 hour period. ( I do not have the link, search his post) So the timing can be made accurate enough.
Question #2- I think you will want to use the Hardware PWM and an interrupt.
Sequence of events (Flow Chart )
PIC #1 is using the COUNT command to monitor incoming signal from existing product.
If COUNT does not equal a pulse every 4ms GOTO SEND_RC.
PIC #2 receives signal from PIC #1.
PIC #2 does something.
All the while the radio link is "HOT" so PIC #2 will be receiving data waiting fo a certain command. Use SERIN2 with the WAIT modifier.
We can work on the details some more later if this is all correct.
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