Hi Bearpawz,
I am using the exact setup you are. I use it, attached to COM2. I have found it sometimes gets reset back to com1. I find I sometimes have to erase the chip twice to program it. I have even had the situation where after erasing once, I need to fill the buffer with all zeros, program the chip and then program the chip with the hex file, it seems to erase and program normally then. The jumper on your programmer has to be moved, to switch from the smaller 18 pin to the 40 pin devices. hope this helps.
JS