It's all working, but the code will be somewhat embarassing when I have to explain that I had to trick it into working. The chip is a 18F4515.
Configs:
'NOTE THAT CONFIGS ARE COMMENTED OUT IN THE 18F4515.INC FILE.
@ CONFIG OSC = INTIO67
@ CONFIG PBADEN=OFF
@ CONFIG MCLRE=ON
@ CONFIG WDT=OFF
@CONFIG STVREN=OFF
@CONFIG LVP=OFF

OSCILLATOR SETTINGS:

OSCCON=%01110000 'SET TO 8 MHZ
OSCTUNE=%11000000 'TURN ON PLL X4 FREQ NOW 32MHZ