Acetronics2
- 2nd February 2007, 09:59
Read in one of our today's newspapers :
1. Beware the lightning that lurketh in an undischarged capacitor, lest it cause thee to be bounced upon thy buttocks in a most ungentlemanly manner.
2. Cause thou the switch that supplies large quantities of juice to be opened and thusly tagged, so thy days may be only on this earthly vale of tears.
3. Prove to thyself that all circuits that radiateth and upon which thou worketh are grounded, less they lift thee to high frequency potential and cause thee to radiateth also.
4. Take care thou useth the proper method when thou taketh the measure of high voltage circuits so that thou doth not incinerate both thee and the meter; for verily, thou hast no account number and can easily be replaced, the meter doth have one, and as a consequence, bringeth much woe unto the supply department.
5. Tarry not amongst those who engage in intentional shocks, for they are not long for this world.
6. Take care thou tampereth not with interlocks and safety devices, for this will incur the wrath of thy seniors and bringeth the fury of the safety officer down about thy head and shoulders.
7. Work thou not on energized equipment, for if you doth, thy buddies will surely be buying beers for thy widow and consoling her in other ways not generally accepted by thee.
8. Verily, verily I say unto thee, never service high voltage equipment alone, for electric cooking is a slothful process and thy might sizzle in thine own fat for hours on end before thy Maker sees fit to end thy misery and drag thee into His fold.
9. Trifle thou not with radioactive tubes and substances, lest thou commence to glow in the dark like a lightning bug, and thy wife be frustrated nightly and have no further use for thee except thy wage.
10. Commit thou to memory the works of the prophets, which are written in the instruction books, which giveth the straight dope and which consoleth thee, and thou cannot make mistakes, yeah well sometimes, maybe.
Author unknown
...
1. Beware the lightning that lurketh in an undischarged capacitor, lest it cause thee to be bounced upon thy buttocks in a most ungentlemanly manner.
2. Cause thou the switch that supplies large quantities of juice to be opened and thusly tagged, so thy days may be only on this earthly vale of tears.
3. Prove to thyself that all circuits that radiateth and upon which thou worketh are grounded, less they lift thee to high frequency potential and cause thee to radiateth also.
4. Take care thou useth the proper method when thou taketh the measure of high voltage circuits so that thou doth not incinerate both thee and the meter; for verily, thou hast no account number and can easily be replaced, the meter doth have one, and as a consequence, bringeth much woe unto the supply department.
5. Tarry not amongst those who engage in intentional shocks, for they are not long for this world.
6. Take care thou tampereth not with interlocks and safety devices, for this will incur the wrath of thy seniors and bringeth the fury of the safety officer down about thy head and shoulders.
7. Work thou not on energized equipment, for if you doth, thy buddies will surely be buying beers for thy widow and consoling her in other ways not generally accepted by thee.
8. Verily, verily I say unto thee, never service high voltage equipment alone, for electric cooking is a slothful process and thy might sizzle in thine own fat for hours on end before thy Maker sees fit to end thy misery and drag thee into His fold.
9. Trifle thou not with radioactive tubes and substances, lest thou commence to glow in the dark like a lightning bug, and thy wife be frustrated nightly and have no further use for thee except thy wage.
10. Commit thou to memory the works of the prophets, which are written in the instruction books, which giveth the straight dope and which consoleth thee, and thou cannot make mistakes, yeah well sometimes, maybe.
Author unknown
...